Job interview: not bad after all!

Last time I wrote I was in panic for an interview and struggling to find enough self confidence to do a good job.
Well, the interview ended up going beyond my expectations. I got a job offer and then my current boss started negotiating. I also got really good comments from everyone.
This new job I was offered is really really cool: team work, fast paced, high level, some travelling, etc. The boss is a fantastic woman I really look up to and her boss is this really famous guy, so it’s quite a high profile job. I was so excited I had decided to say yes at first.
But then I came back to my senses: where I am now it’s less cool but I can handle treatments, IVFs and adoption meetings. My boss is not too inspiring, and not well organised, which is often frustrating, but he’s not strict so he doesn’t bother me much when I’m in late, when I’m grumpy, teary, when I have zero efficiency levels for a couple of weeks because I’m recovering from IVF etc. So after a week of thinking and stressing over decision making, I decided to stay in my current job.
I have often heard stories of parents saying how they gave up better career paths for a good family life. It is weird to be doing the same for a child who does not exist and may not ever exist. If I end up being childless forever, I will regret this. But if I accept the new job and end up childless, I will feel guilty for ever, I will feel like the cause of my unhappiness and that’s too hard.
But this whole job madness with people fighting to have me has reminded me of my value. This year of tests, IVFs, tears, of feeling inadequate, inferior, different and generally unhappy had made me forget about it. It does feel good to be reminded!

This entry was posted in Infertility, life and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Job interview: not bad after all!

  1. E v e l y n says:

    I think it’s fantastic that you got an offer; it really is empowering isn’t it?

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