After seeing the urologist, I started wondering what to do: he suggested to change gynecologist as ours was good but not great and gave us the contacts of four alternatives.
Changing means three things I don’t like:
- Waiting longer: we have already waited since July, so adding more time seems unbearable. At the same time I know that if I were more objective I would see that a couple more months at this stage won’t make a huge difference.
- Not knowing what will happen: where I am, I know the gynecologist can be moody, tactless and hard to reach but I know I can handle her.
- Starting from zero: this IVF thing is a bit of a trial and error procedure, where they experiment stuff and then adjust accordingly. In this sense the first IVF with someone is always a bit of the error phase. Starting with someone new feels like I’m going to go for the error and for a guaranteed failed IVF.
I know most of these are just fears, and that I simply feel uncomfortable with changing habits and plans.
The urologist gave us four names:
- A slightly forgetful and spaced-out but very nice lady. She’s out of my list: I had enough of forgetful.
- Nice calm old guy who takes the time to explain things well.
- A young super organised girl.
- Another quite well known guy.
I went to see No. 3. I picked her first as I was told she was super organised and indeed so she was! She looks like she would take care of things and be in charge of decision making, as opposed to my old one who was always a bit lost. She also said she would do the scans herself, which is great since she’ll then know what to look for at the IVF. I find this very reassuring as I had the impression the previous one didn’t really know what she was looking for. As a consequence I had done IVF with only local anesthesia and this lead to a mess of me trying to help but not managing because of the pain and the hyper-stimulation. The drawback is that this new lady is a bit cold and distant. But at this point, isn’t it skills I’m looking for rather than a warm chat?
So, now I have three possibilities:
- stay with the old gynecologist, since I know her and I can start treatments in February, knowing that I can always change later.
- go for the cold super-organised lady and wait a bit longer (probably IVF in May)
- wait and go see No. 4 who is quite well known and then decide (this will probably mean no IVF before June).
Is it time for a change or not quite yet?