Ladies and gentlemen… I have finally started stimming for IVF#4!! Yuppy!! I’m also 5 days into treatments and have not had to cancel the cycle (yet?). Yey!!
Everything is ok so far but it has not been easy (when is it ever easy??!). After loads of efforts to be in good shape for IVF, I started stims feeling like crap due to the pre-treatment I take to get my period. I had horrible headaches and felt like I was coming up with a bad cold. The first days of stimms I have also felt quite sick, mostly feeling dizzy and drowsy. Just as I started feeling better, swelling and tummy pain started, giving me a bit of an OHSS scare. I have also been worried since I got double doses compared to IVF#3. Last time I had 150 of Gonal-F I had to cancel the cycle. But the new gynecologist is checking on me quite often and giving me additional drugs to prevent OHSS. Among these I had my first injections of Orgalutran, which of course gave me a localised allergic reaction. Apparently it is quite common and I shouldn’t worry. I wish I had read that before having a panic attack..
Do you not wish you could just be in a bubble during IVF? I really feel like I don’t need anything other than what I already have to handle (work, jabs, appointments, healthy eating and cooking…). Yet, it seems that the universe doesn’t agree with my wish for isolation. Here is a bunch of things I would have preferred to skip:
- A colleague – who knows of our troubles – just came back from maternity leave and spent lunch break telling us how sad and tired she is. The tiny bit of sympathy I had vanished when she said the baby actually slept all night and that she was tired as missing time for herself.
- Someone I haven’t seen in over 10 years emailed to catch up and asked: “how many kids do you have?”.
- A girl I hardly know from the support group I used to go to emailed after two years of no news (in which she had her now one-year old). She has started treatments for FET and explained that it is much harder to do FETs after having a baby as they waited so long to use the frosties. I think she’s looking for exchange and support but I’m not the right person at the moment..
- My friends, who know I’m in the middle of treatments, suddenly need help with all sort of things from baby christening to job applications.
I guess it’s just life that goes on while I wish it could be on hold for everyone and not just for me…
Luckily, I also have some friends who lighten up my days and make it easier to go through treatments. Over the week-end I went for a lovely walk with some friends who came to visit. I also went to an amazing photography exhibition with friends from Uni (the picture you see is one of the ones I liked the most). And last, but certainly not least, I met our lovely Little Wife for a really nice afternoon tea break.
Maybe I don’t really need to be in a bubble… what do you think? do you feel in an IVF bubble?
(Photy by Henri Cartier Bresson)